$1.65 Painkiller can't cure this

The $1.65/pill painkiller worked surprisingly well for AS.. and actually, it was manufactured to be easier on the stomach... just so it happen to cut down on instances of allergic reaction too.

So i tested the new painkiller today, with no side effect.. maybe also no painkilling effect.. lol.. got used to it so much that i can't feel the difference.

Anyway, other things to perhaps, be happy about. 3 FIs announced yesterday that they will compensate/buyback the failed structured products from those deemed vulnerable. By vulnerable they mean those old and/or those that receive little education. Sadly, the matriarch of my village failed to qualify for either criteria. Strangely, it seems that everybody else is supposed to know what a swap is by default. And if you fail to inform investors of the exact risk/reward profile of the product in detail, and then shift all responsibility to investors just becoz they signed on the dotted line is kind of without ethics. And to get staffs not meeting the mark through extensive training or education/knowledge to serve the general population is definitely not a very professional thing to do.

Compensating on a case by case basis is goodwill on the part of the FIs, but vulnerable doesn't always have to apply to old people and those that received little education. Again, finance is not something that everybody knows.. unless it is incorporated in your daily job, or you happen to study finance. Some of the terms like swaps are not something everyone can understand. It isn't a surprised that many still thinks that the structured product is a bond. Why not? the name itself is already misleading. But to compensate through certain criteria is as if that the rest really deserve it for putting implicit trusts in those that sell them the products, so when it fails, they OBG right?

However, i must say that the FIs are working very hard to find a resolution. And now for the rest, there might be an option of letting the product to run for another few more years till maturity. Yet, it just prove to be even more sleepless nights.. imagine having to wake up every morning wondering whether your investment is safe.. and it all happened becoz you thought it was having a similar risk profiles of a bond.

So that day on ST, someone said that it is unfair for FIs to compensate for the losses of the investors becoz it is in black and white. And then this someone compared the investors to gamblers of a casino saying that you can't demand a return of your chips from the casino operator just because you lost them on the tables. And if this is possible, the shareholders of listed companies can also demand compensation for a fall in share prices. IMO, if it doesn't happen to you, you won't feel the pain.. however, that is besides the point.

For:-
(the "you" refer to the author of the article)

1) Investors are not gamblers. You gamble with that knowledge of losing everything.. but bond investors (as some of the investor are being misled into thinking that they are bond investors) are those with low risk profiles. Heard of risk aversion? Heard of equity premium puzzle? (and even though so, the minibond is NOT even a bond, so there might be no premium puzzle)

2) Gambling is a zero sum game. Either the casino wins or the punters win. There is no win-win situation. Investing on the other hand is SUPPOSED to be a win-win situation for the FIs and investors.

3) Investors do not over-invest. They just failed to diversify. Why diversify if you truly believed that this so called "bond" (which i must stress again is not a bond) is SUPPOSED to be safe? Then you will diversify your interest away don't you? And failure to diversify is not over-gambling.

4) Gamblers can choose whatever game they wished to play, without the dealer influencing them on their decision. Some sales staff from the FIs try to sell the structured products to people who just want a simple fixed deposit. You really think those being swayed by the sales staffs really deserved it? Do you think they represent the product in a fair manner?

5) Shareholders are owners, investors are lenders. In anycase, lenders are creditors that have a priority claim higher than that of a shareholder in the event of insolvency. To par shareholders with lenders is another load of bull. If they are the same, why don't they share some of the profits with the investors?

6) Shareholders can hold the management liable if they failed to perform (for example the dropping of share prices) in the coming AGM by replacing those responsible.. but for the investors, what real option do they have in this case? Lawsuit? Protest? And even so, they do not solve the root of the problem.

I'm just short of flaming the author.. and already this entry is slightly altered to omit the more unfriendly expression. But after reading his/her full article, it is something really IHO (in his/her opinion), and perhaps the greatest mistake is making it into the ST.. that's all.

Of coz, to make shareholders pay (through a fall in share prices) is not fair, neither is making taxpayers pay through fiscal/monetary policies. For sure, this is hardly a win-win situation.. coz someone, somewhere, has already won. The money is somewhere else, maybe in some high-end SPA, but nowhere near that is.

There won't be any solution soon, and the solution won't be as clear cut as those being compensated in full. Every decision is critical.. and so it is putting a lot of stress on the village's matriarch. You think she really deserves it?

Theme Hospital (again)

Was at ttsh for my follow up... coz the medication caused an allergy reaction. The pill used to work for me, but no longer. Perhaps older, and the system can no longer cope with the medication.

So the pill was 'upgraded'. A newer, better, and more expensive drug. Supposed to have less probability of a reaction.. i hope. Will take the least possible dose and wait again for any reaction.. hopefully this new med will work for me.

The new pills cost $80 more per month (!).. coz it is still new.. just hope that i won't have to rely on them.. for i can do a lot more other things with that $80. Anyway, it was prescribed for me to use when the pain become unbearable. $1.60 per pill leh.. got pain i also say no pain.

Still don't know will get an allergy reaction or not.. till then ba..

Theme Physiotherapy

Was off to ttsh (again.. again.. and again) for physiotherapy. Again, it's been 10 years since i last visited it.. and again, it changed so much. In the past, it used to be just a small room, with only a few patients doing some sort of exercise. Now, the department shifted and they've got plenty of space and equipment. Just that they have not installed the self-registration kiosk yet.. that is the norm liao leh.

Anyway, i'm considered as discharged le.. coz i was there to just learn some stretching exercise. Actually didn't want to.. but my doctor say just learn so that i can manage AS better.

It's quite fun there actually.. and it looks just like a gym.. a very big one, and each patients got their own 'personal trainer'. It cost quite a lot (without subsidy) for just a short session of physio.. thankfully, the govt got subsidize.. if not i think i pay until peng.

And really, i am not disabled, and won't be.. and i can function the same as always. So no worries.

Quarter of a Century

Already 25 le.. just like that, a quarter of a century.

Nothing much today, yet it was a great one. Especially so from all the well wishes.. really appreciate it. =D

Had a very nice jap dinner with the villagers.. and now, i really enjoy having meals with them. It used to be a time where i choose not to.. coz i think it's really quite ma fan. I guess my thinking changed over the years le.

Though today feels like any other day, somehow it seems different. Perhaps i am still fortunate in some way. Anyway, happy bday to me, and may i have many many great years ahead!

Theme Polyclinic

Woke up quite early today coz i got an appointment with the dermatologist at mount e. Of all places, why there? Well, it really cost much the same elsewhere for some of the procedures.. might as well get the opinion from a specialist. Of coz when there is a chance to save, i would.. that's why i spent quite the other half of the day in a polyclinic to get a referral to NSC. Anyway, just sort of a "routine" checkup quite distant from any forms of arthritis thus far.

If being older means a greater need to take care of one's health, then this is it. A friend that sent me an email made it quite a point to have a healthy body before doing anything thing else (the one about stones in a jar). This is my top priority now. Having 2 health issues to tackle simultaneously is not a very delightful thing to do, yet with age, the cost of procrastinating is higher. So what better time to get it done than now? I'm unemployed by choice (perhaps even cyclically unemployed, i won't know), coz i've got issues to iron out. I admit i'm being defiant for not being/sounding enthusiastic in finding a job.. yet it would be unfair to say i didn't want to work. I've got 6 medical appointments in the month of october, and another few more in november.. and perhaps even more at a later date coz of the newer one at NSC. Try to find me an employer that won't find it a nuisance (as in working for just 3 out of 4 weeks). Judging me without understanding the whole issue is getting quite disturbing lately. Yet, if you don't tell, they won't know. Partially my fault.. yet one don't go about telling people about these things (perhaps i niam a lot to some of you.. but only a few knew.. maybe only my mum knew what was going on).

Again, this is just a "routine" medical checkup that needs quite a bit of time to have it settled (with all the testings and such), and hopefully it is just this once where i need to get it done.

And so after the visit to mount e, i was referred to a polyclinic. It was just like another repeat of the scenario almost a decade ago with the arthritis. Mount e to polyclinic then to hospital. And for that arthritis, the whole village spent 6 months from GPs, to acupuncture, to take TCM, and all the other stuffs. But no one could diagnose the arthritis.. that is until my aunt recommended an osteologist and all it took was a simple blood test to make a correct diagnosis. 6 months lor.

Its been 10 years since i last visited any polyclinics (i usually go to the GP near my place for some minor flu and cough).. and it changed a lot. Very high tech (a bit like sua ku wor.. hahaha) coz of the automated registration system. And the whole place is air-conditioned! LOL.. coz a long long time ago, it wasn't.. and then the whole place is like very messy with all the people waiting at the same place. Not sick see liao also sick. Now it was so much organised wor.. and then the doctor, staffs and even the police guards are so polite lor. Really can nominate for good service le.

Just that as with all "theme games", there is a need to move from departments to departments.. lol.. that is a lot of moving around, number calling and seeing new rooms and equipments. But overall, still quite efficient... from the time i registered till the time i left, it took me just around an hour.

Well, i rather not have more of this kind of theme games to play.. but seems the next one coming up is "theme NSC".

And i'm quite tired of 'playing' le.

A Simple Question

A simple question - "Is this fair?"

A very familiar question, and even more so when it was put across to the CEO of a now defunct investment bank elsewhere. Why is it unfair? Why not? Coz what he received during he tenure of 8 years is enough to buy him 500 ferraris.. or maybe more since it was in USD. And to receive such bonus while not being able to maintain the solvency of the bank, is it really fair?

Very irresponsible of him.. and the whole insolvency caused so much "stress and inconvenience" to the whole village... especially in times of impending economic crisis (which is again made worse by them). The wait for a resolution from the fallout is getting too draggy le.. and it is no wonder why the villagers are unhappy.

If it doesn't happen to you, you won't know how it feels.

Better

Finally, the swelling went away. Just that i might need a new class of pills. NSAIDs are out for now.

Better, as in everything and anything. To link everything up to previous episodes would be very unfair, and really, i've already forgotten a lot.

Couldn't recall anymore on most things, so i guess everything is now a new experience for me. That includes going about finding a new painkiller and going for physio (if they stop asking me to perform those clown tricks with the ah pehs and ah mas).. which although is nothing new to me in some way.. well, i do hoped that at a different age, the experience would be different as well.. and maybe a new and positive perspective as to why all these big changes happen to fall on me.

I do not blame anyone, especially my mum.. coz she always thought she's responsible for my arthritis.. from not eating well during her pregnancy to not finding a nanny in time to take care of me.. but really, sometimes it just happens even if you don't do anything.

Anyway, sometime really very pek chek over a lot of things, but it is always good not to linger for too long.

Allergy

I am allergic to many things, and indomethacin is one of them. Now Naproxen also wants to join in the fun.

Was given painkillers for AS, most likely the same old medication i used to have, but the packaging and colour changed. Strangely, i suspect that i might have an allergy reaction after taking.. so i reduced the dose by half. Sure enough, 3 hours later, my eyes swell like don't know what.

Luckily i just took 1/2 the dose. Full dose, who knows?

So i called ttsh today, and they are all so polite.. hahaha.. can vote them for the best service award le.

I guess i might be back there in some time soon. Sooner than the follow up appointment 2 weeks later. See what i mean? It's like back to 9 years ago where i visit ttsh every 2 weeks, doing blood test every time, and wait for hours for the lab report. Now i know what i can do le.. that is.. bring PSP! hahahaha.. 9 yrs ago don't have psp.. now got liao must make use wor.. lol.. i'm so 'looking forward' (as if.. but i got no choice ma..)to my next visit.

This october is looking bad le.. it seems like a month of visiting doctors. Thankfully, i can have the time to settle these without disruption to my work (if there is any work). Hopefully i can settle all these once and for all by next year.

This is a pic of my swollen eyes....... do not scroll down if you are eating.. lol..
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Sigh.

Theme Hospital

After 4 hours at TTSH, was finally back home.

TTSH was so upgraded le.. now registration also automated. Just scan will do. So convenient wor.

I thought it would be a routine checkup, but seems like i've got to go for another round of adjustment again. On the bright side, at least now i start with the correct clinic.

My whole day was spent going around ttsh (actually all the clinics are at B1 nia) but felt like a patient inside "theme hospital".. from specialist clinic to blood test clinic to x-ray department then back to the clinic and finally to the pharmacy.. it was quite depressing lor. Everywhere i went, i was the youngest patient.. how sian it was. The blood sample taken from me were much more than usual.. And i didn't quite like taking X-rays too.. hahaha.. coz got to remove my clothing and wear the weird robe.. and.. and... the robe is wear liao like never wear like that lor. Then still got to 'pose' on the glass-like bed.. ar...... Like that even more depressed le.

With the confirmation from the x-ray, my rheumatoid arthritis (RA) (not the restricted artistic hor) got 'upgraded' to ankylosing spondylitis (AS). -____- The name get more and more chim. It wasn't so much of the leg now, but rather the spine. It seems that it might actually be a case of AS instead of RA.. which means the inflammation from the outset was just another prelude. This prelude took almost 10 years.. coz only now then, can the X-ray confirm everything. If anyone can make a vineyard out of this, i say i'd rather trade it for a papaya plantation.

Actually quite some 4 years ago, i already felt uncomfortable.. but i thought it was something else.. maybe something even more sinister. But now everything is solved. Almost. At least the eventual worse case scenario of AS isn't very very bad... that is if the worst case ever happens. It might never happen. At least won't be paralyzed, and won't die from AS.. just a great deal of prolonged discomfort, pain, and stiffness.. i'm already lucky. At least i am not disabled.

Very sian day, starting with a very sian dream. I'm just so glad that the staff at ttsh are all very polite.. it just make me feel a little bit better. A little bit, is already a lot le. Let it just only be today.. let it not be the lord of the rings for me or anybody else in the future.

Vacation Mode Nightmare

And i thought that sleeping early will get me a better rest.. but how ironic.

For the past few days, i've been sleeping at around 5am... and everything seems to fall out of pace. So i tried to sleep early.. at around 11pm... but this too doesn't help. I woke up to a 'vacation mode' nightmare.. and it felt like a prelude to something else. More likely, it was the summation of everything thus far, with elements of the 'latest' things i've seen or heard. I guess, the inevitable will happen sooner or later.. and i thought i wouldn't mind. I feel so helpless now. I mean really very. =(

5am now.. and it felt like the old days where i got to wake up early to go school.

Just a while more to daybreak, and i've got my ttsh followup later.

Snow + Frost

In bad times, prices will go up instead of coming down. It's just like 屋漏再逢連夜雨.

First it was the bus fare and electricity bills. Then it was telephone bills. What's next?

The increase came almost untimely.. but this is how things work. They are merely trying survive as they can no longer absorb the increase in cost.

Oh great... it's just like one of those economy downturn ride again.

Doh liao loh~

Just like the stock market today, MOS (sg) doh-ed today.

I guess it must have made no difference. Most crubs here are short-lived, with the exception of a few which are still around. The then MOS was so high-profiled, with different rooms offering different genre. For the usual crubs, the genre is determined by the day of the week. Then it was starting to get rather werid. Anyway, it isn't as fun as it was supposed to be.

Then the market doh-ed today, creating a new low of 2.1k+. It was almost on its way to 4k just last july. A zero sum game, the transfer of wealth must be great. Most likely, the rich got richer, the poor got poorer. As usual. But the stock market is supposed to be 'risky', to some extent, like a online casino with a in-house loanshark. You can always 'contra' even if you don't have the cash needed, and some time before the ban of naked shorting, opportunity to short shares even if you don't own the shares. Yes, very risky indeed. Even more risky is the trading in warrants (they got expiry date). I once saw a percentage gain/loss of 300% (in a day, and you can gain/lose the same % in that period of time).

Bonds are perceived as a lower risked investment (in at least of investment grade bonds) of coz offered lower rate of return of about 3-5%p.a.. and most likely, the bond is contracted to about 5 years. However however however.. the lehman bros that doh-ed made it all so much different. At least with the stock market (and also the sg insurance co.that attracted people to go there drink coffee), you still can choose to preemp by running first with the money. Lehman lei? No chance. You think people so free to check out on every entities linked to the product meh? If so, i might as well lend the money to the borrower directly and bypass the the FIs. FIs do delegate monitoring? pi ar~ Simi is value add? Value add is after people doh liao then call you say your money all gone?

But given the status of the bros when get involved in these bonds, sales staff will most likely to say/think, "will doh one meh?". Perhaps those willing to invest thought so too. Maybe investor didn't bothered to find out that if one doh, the bond is considered as default. Maybe they didn't even know got such thing.. coz what they see is how much interest income it offered in the next 5-7 years. And with some of the very strong local bank and one of the largest US commercial bank on the list, who cannot be assured? Can you blame the investors? No. Coz they don't really know what thing triggered what, and how will lehman be so involved and affected by the sub-prime toxic. And can you blame the sales for pushing sales? No either. Because nobody can forsee. And if they don't push sales, they won't get the pah pah bonus and all can go eat grass le. Perhaps you can only say they don't know how to sell through emphasizing on the downside enough. But who would sell like that?

I sell bedlinen also never really go tell the whole word that it is made in somewhere else, different from where is company is.. that is unless customers ask. If i go around telling people 'where it is made' instead of 'where it is from' (they are really different) i can go eat grass also le. But made in where is a commonsense question... but financial products are complex. Not commonsense. And it was made even more complicated with the multitude of FIs getting in the picture like forex and i/r swaps, underwriting, guaranteeing and all those fee services. If one link is broken, the product fails.. Cost nobody will want to tah the rubbish for free. Anyway, the money lost isn't theirs.. so the most they can do is say, "sorry".

I didn't say they sell financial products without telling the truth or misleading investors (if they do, most likely people will complain to the central bank le).. i'm just saying that some of them don't emphasize the risk enough. EMPHASIZE on the EMPHASIZE. By enough, maybe keep emphasizing on the entities and their role in the product.. and what will happen to the contract if there is any disruptions to the functions of each of them. No need to explain what is 5% pa. This is confirm commonsense (and most likely they will bold it in the pamphlets). Unless it is written return of 25% in five years, and principal amount not guaranteed. Then they need to emphasize the fine print le.

Maybe coz the sales staff (or 'relationship manager' as they like to call themselves and investors just as the rest of the depositors like to call themselves) didn't go into details that's why so many investors are unhappy. Unhappy that they want to go honglim park this saturday to protest. But.. protest against what? Against the FIs for saying the return is 5%pa, principal is not guaranteed, the risk that you can lose everything should anything under the 'defult section' of the prospectus occurs to any one of the entities? It sounds direct enough. But how many of investors know lehman well enough at that point in time to question the product? I guess that even some of the staff don't even know. At least for the pillowcase, the "made in *****" can be found inside the pillowcase.. and there is even a full refund policy within 30 days. So if anyone is so unhappy seeing the "made in" tag, they can always return the goods. For a full refund somemore. Where to find this feature in financial products? Early bird terminations means they will return less than what you put in.

It won't be a suprise to see how irritated the investors are at honglim park this weekend... coz some of them put their life savings (i've heard a case of one investor putting sgd200k) into these products. It's like suddenly losing your only house overnight. Remember they say don't put all your eggs in one basket? Diversification only works when disaster strikes. And in this case, one of the worse financial disaster of the century.

With that, i think the "equity premium puzzle" (that is why people still go for bonds even though the returns on equity is much higher after risk adjustment) should change to "bond default puzzle" (that is why people want to go for bonds given that you can lose everything overnight even though the risk is so much lower).

Well.. whatever works for those investors this coming sat.. hopefully they will feel better after that. If not, the corner can also go eat grass le.

Oktoberfest!

Liquid to Werks.

At liquid just the other day, saw 3 kids (1 guy and 2 gals)opening a bottle of chivas (of coz is the guy pay). And carry cigarettes somemore. Then my friend 'observed' that the mix was super low content. I think jolly shandy (alcohol content of less than 1%)also beat it hands down. Might as well open a bottle of green tea.. cheaper lor. This is really chill le.. give them 2 years also don't know can finish that bottle or not.

The finger food are so nice at liquid.. and they even got a lot of 'matches' going on, such as the one of tottenham vs man utd (just another one of those silly jokes conjured). All these changed my previous impression of liquid (coz they finally brought the price down to acceptable levels).

And then was to brewerks just 2 days later for another oktoberfest celebration. This time really go for the oktoberfest brew (which they prepare it once a year only). The food there was still as nice, especially the jalapeño on the pizza.. just that price is slightly steep. Compensated with a bus ride home, so overall, was still alright.

October is my favorite month of the year.

Circus Track

Circus track needs clowns too.

Just so nice of them to provide the clowning themselves. And in fact, that was one of the most entertaining act of the season. I don't see what it has got to do with the track. Perhaps everywhere they go, they still will be clowning around. It was clearly a blunder on their on part, so why blame it on the circuit?

But if calling it a circus rather than a circuit will make them feel better, so be it. I'll feel better to call them clowns too.

Wouldn't it be Nice if.....

the world was less 'interesting'?

It must be once in a lifetime experience to witness the collapse of the financial markets and the contamination of dairy products to run in parallel.

Melamine was added to raise protein levels artificially the same way as lending indiscriminately to raise profit levels. I now understand why the US$700bn bailout failed. It really was unfair to let the people pay for the mistake of those individuals. Yet, it might just affect them the same in any case.

And there seems no end at the moment.

Another chocolate found tainted, and another bank collapsed. What next? People shunned the stock markets as they do to dairy products. Now they really want to make it less interesting.

Something

Somehow, something spurred me to get to 'work'. It used to, and it still did. Anyway, it was by 'chance' when it happened.

I wondered what if, i wondered why not and i wondered why that's why.

And as if my dreams can work like the "on-demand" tv, it just gave me something more to ponder about right after. I guess there are always some point in time where i would like to have a vacation (if vacation is what that is).

Already i can sense some contradiction, and already it was different.

My STM only works in the short term, and in the long run, memory seems to based on what i thought it was. Certain things, i remembered wasn't really so, and perhaps, they never really occurred. Anyway, i don't want to forget anything anymore.

Doesn't make any sense i know.. and most probably i would once again forget what i was trying to convey some time in the future. In any case, i kept thinking about a particular path these days... and i quite missed it.

F1

Yeah.. the first f1 night race is over, and it really wasn't that bad when there are other things to look out for.

Street circuit is usually boring.. coz the track is too narrow to overtake, and so more or less the starting position will be the finishing position. It all depends on the pit strategy then. Then there is this safety car that appears during accidents, creating opportunities for those behind to catch up.

However, the race just now was rather interesting. And it was rather unique to see cars driving off with the fuel pipes still attached.. lol.. must be the 'lollipop man' (the one hold a sign that looks like a lollipop in front) sleeping on duty. Sadly the Ferrari team didn't manage to chalk up any championship points on our track.

It really wasn't that bad, coz already knew there would be bumps.. just that i didn't get to see that much leaves on a f1 track before. Surprisingly, there isn't much problems with the pit location (coz they didn't want to go in at the same time i supposed). With 2 channels at home showing the same live telecast (and so i can siam the commercials), what more can i ask for? Bumpy track? So be it.

First Ever Bumpy (Night) Grand Prix

Just as the GP starts here, another bank (WAMU) in the US bites the dust. Although the depositors' savings are protected, somehow, it just show how bad the bank is being managed even though there are plenty text examples about ALM (asset and liability management) and all that. I really doubt they put it into good use (wondered where all the additional profits from the addition risks taken went to). Anyway, it just shows that the show ain't over yet.

Finally got to watch the world's first ever night GP today at home, on the tv. Tix were too expensive by the way. I was awed by the fact that it took place at night.. coz the tv screen just look weird with all the cars racing at night. Apart from that, nothing really that trilling. Street circuit is common, especially under the shadows of the Monaco street circuit (nice view by the way)... or so i thought.

Then it struck me. I was wondering why the cars were bouncing around. Sparks were literally flying. It was too bumpy le. It turns out that their greatest concern about the lighting was nothing much afterall. Then the pit lane was inconveniently located, such that drivers entering the pit will block those trying to rush to the start/finishing straights. It was also quite funny to see the branches blocking some parts of the view..

Even though they might want to showcase some of the landmarks of sg such as the anderson bridge, sg flyer, durian esplanade and all the others, in the night, on my tv, i can't really see much (maybe they should shine that wow-so-special lights on these landmarks instead).Or maybe they should consider including our ERP gantry lor.. uniquely sg wor. The 'hole' in one of the grandstand looks special though, and i quite liked it. By the way, the markings on the road looks irritating.. it was pointing one way, while the cars were traveling in another direction.

Well.. it was kind of difficult for the organisers to foresee these problems, especially the bumpy road surface. But at least they could have done a bit more dry runs (with more road closures sadly) using different race lines. Sadly, the bumps are making this track famous instead of being the first night race.

Oh by the way, don't expect locals to be excited about the GP.. it's just not the same as the olympics. We don't have our very own drivers, not even foreign talents.

With experience and feedback, i supposed the race next year will be greater and nicer. After 5 years, we will know whether the marina circuit is a success or not.. and i hoped i will at least once get to see it 'live'... after i've store enough of my salary.

p/s: it's IMO purely, really.

The "Lost Decade"

The lost decade is with reference to the jap economy during the 1990s. It was caused by asset price bubble and it took them very long to recover.

Similarly, the US might have the same outcome coz one thing leads to another... and another and another.

Just hope that with the 'lesson learnt' decades ago, they can put an end to all these nonsense sooner.

With that, i think my banking degree is barely sufficient to tackle the banking sector now.. and hopefully if i ever attempt another path, i don't end up with a lost decade again.

Milk Crisis

Somehow, the tainted milk is just like the bad assets of the financial sector. It just spread and spread, and then many end users find themselves exposed to the risk.. just becoz someone at the beginning didn't do their job.

The intention of adding melamine is very zek ark.. as with the sub prime lending and borrowing. For profit, the rest didn't really matter to them huh?

Just once is enough le lor.. i already miss the luncheon meat, now i'm going to miss all the dairy products.

CFG

Saturday 9/20:
In the end, the 2x 179 wasn't back at scc (still 'on the go'), and i only got to know about it at the last minute. No choice, had to pack my baobei horn and got it ready for a long long journey to scc at boonlay. After packing, i was running late.. and thought of taking cab down to boonlay.... but too expensive le.. so had to fork out 1.5 hours instead of $15.

Tried a different bus to scc as 242 is 24/7 full. With my baobei horn, it is quite difficult to alight. As recommended, i took 199 instead.. waited quite a while, but was worth it.

Reached, and then.. and then... and then.. the whole band attendance was only 3. Perhaps due to the on going cfg all around ba.. so can't blame them. I'm just thankful that i didn't rush down in a cab. Theme of the day - "Méditation".

We each did our own practice.. and maybe i did less than what i usually do at home. Sounded very horrible near the sound absorbing wall, but suan le ba.. i bo form.

Sunday 9/21:
Slept at 6am, but woke up by sis at around 10+am. She said grandma invite us to go to our cfg. Sis had to go out in the afternoon, so i just go lor. Actually had been to another cfg the previous week, and more or less, expect the same things.. and indeed, really more or less the same, especially the introduction video. One more time, and i can recite the script le.


The cfg banner.. my 'receipt' of being there..

Reached home quite tired, yet couldn't sleep due to another cup of kopi-c. A few more, and i will have to bleach my teeth before interview starts.

Glimmer

Finally something not as gloomy.

The STI managed to climb back from the negative after lunch amid some positive news. The central banks pumped in more liquidity, and the remaining banks are on their way to mergers. Plus, some markets are putting a temporary halt to short-selling (which drives the share down by selling first and then buying back the shares at a lower price). They could have done all these sooner rather than to allow the market to 'correct' itself. IMO, i don't believe in the invisible hand of market, for there are none. It is driven by "hope, greed and fear".. and with these emotions, nothing will work to models and assumptions.

Excessive long buying will create bubbles where only the greatest fool loses out (the last one to own the stock and finding no other buyers at that price), while excessive shorting spooks the market, and cause others to short even when it is irrational. People are just too afraid of losing than gaining even if the probability is 50/50 (loss aversion under behavioral finance). This makes short selling a very common strategy during times of crisis (when you get a lot of people doing short selling) making it a self-fulfilling prophecy and it is enough to bring an institution down (hence creating all the shockwaves and all the clearing up in years to come). Of coz, there are those who are critical of behavioral finance, but that is IYO (In your opinion).

Maybe the financial market evolved too much that it is very difficult to untangle all the mess now. And the current solution - pump in more money (money comes from tax payers mind you) and let them (the assets) slowly recover.. really slowly, like that of the japan economy will take decades.. just because some of the FIs anyhow lend.. a bit papaya lor.

Financial Shockwave

At some point in time, i thought i was immune to the financial crisis at the other side of the globe. Who knows, the shock wave hit me faster than i thought, directly. And i wasn't even talking about the local stock market or my jobbing prospect yet.

They say never to put all eggs in a basket, but they didn't say not to put different eggs into the same basket. And that had somehow made me think that i've yet retained for another year and retaking 3 extra modules. As always, the feeling of losing something won't feel good, as with losing anything.

And i almost forgot... lehman bros, you good huh..

Anyway, the market continued to bleed, with those wounded now also dying.. which leads more being wounded. In the end, those with the ability to end all these will come in and rescue/raid the ailing companies that is considered a bargain. But, IMO nobody will want to act now.. the problem will only get worse, and more confidence shaken and ending up with less money in the financial markets... until they decide that enough is enough.

Now they didn't even want to lend, as signaled by the IBOR, for fear of the ultimate fool. The problem is, no matter who lends who, the money is from someone else.. and then it will have the domino effect if the ultimate fool fails. IMO, i think they themselves can cause more damage to their economy than any other.

Today the STI LSed again, with the biggest drop of the week (as at 12.30pm) with over 100pts of drop. To date, over 1k pts was wiped off since the last peak. I guess all these will be the future textbook context when it all ended.

Sequential Service Constraint

Wow.. 1st time seeing the "sequential service constraint" problem happening right at home. Just not very serious, coz as all FI (Financial Institutes) operates, they are heavily regulated, especially in sg context. So by running at the FI, people make it more difficult for them to survive, and you can say it is a "self fulfilling prophecy". Take all the money out liao then how can they make money to survive? Certain amount are invested in long-term asset.. which means when people withdraw their money, they are creating liquidity problems for the FIs. As such, the FI got either to borrow short term from the central bank or sell their assets (which might not fetch as much now).. so in the end, they will lose out.

I think i can write an entire essay lor.. haha.. how come when i take my exam that time the financial world wasn't that 'happening' ar?

Chapter 11

By now, the news of Lehman, Merrill and AIG is covering most of the news headlines (at least on the cnbc).

Lehman doh-ed under chapter 11 (reorganisation) of the bankruptcy code today while AIG is seeking bridge loans. Merrill on the other hand seems to be 'rescued' by the Bank of America.

I don't know whether if i'm fortunate or unfortunate to be living through as what was described at the "worst economy crisis in a hundred years". I wondered if the great depression of 1929 can even par this. Why is the economy so susceptible to bubbles? Of all the proposed explanations, i liked the "greater fool" theory best. It seems, a lot of people are 24/7 optimistic about anything and everything. Optimistically optimistic that there are a lot more 'fools' out there. And if it rang any bell, you can see it in some 'business models' that required you to recruit more people in order to earn more.

The sub-prime might be similar to the economy bubble of japan, and that already took quite a while to 'recover'. As with that bubble, the sub-prime crisis might also take some time.

Perhaps all will be well IMO in 2 - 3 years (i'm being the fool here), maybe longer depending on whether anymore of them want to doh. Even if banks are no longer exposed to those assets, the whole movement of 'investments' might take some time to return. Just be thankful that people are not starting to run at the banks. Meanwhile, it all translate to more bull ls tomorrow. IMO, i don't think it is any time to enter the market if the strategy is long term. However, short term hit-and-run strategy is still possible, even to the extend of 'short-selling'. Why not? Opportunities are plentiful in bull or bear, just that the window is smaller.

Swollen Feet

Got up from bed around 10am+, and i thought i've stepped on something early in the morning. Turned up to be that my feet was swollen, and it became so numb that i almost can't feel my feet touching the floor.

I guess it must have another flare up of arthritis. Been aching all over, quite permanently and sometimes really irritated by it. Yet at other times, i've quite forgotten about it. My 'extra' weight (that is 4kgs)is putting quite a strain on my feet.. plus i've carried my baobei horn (that is another 4kgs) around for the whole of yesterday. No wonder i'm aching all over.

Anyway, the next medical follow up is just next month.

Sometimes i niam a lot coz i don't want to forget how bad it was when it all started.. i'm already quite thankful that it got better.. however slight.

Redundant

Today i've been made rather redundant. From 2 become 7, the horn section grew 2.5 times. And it was only when i reached that i thought i should have otherwise.

I've never played in a band with 7 horns before. Regardless the skill level, 7 is still quite an overkill.

And since it was so, i overkill-ed on the overkill.. but i'm glad the tone was still ok too. I couldn't hear myself very well really.. coz most of them are trying to overkill too.. and seriously the tuning was super out during the dry run.

Actual performance was rather alright, just that i find that being the side/background is not really that appealing to me. Can i just come in and play and then leave after playing? Miscued 1 wrong note altogether.. but it makes no difference. Even if i didn't play, there won't be any difference.

We became the "ad-hoc" band, with lots of ad-hoc players and attire. Ok la.. i just fail to see the positive light out of the whole thing. Maybe i'm just too shocked to see so many horns after a dry spell of almost 7 years. I promise i will be more appreciative the next time. Further more, this is not a band event, so actually is like that one.. as with all the other. I guess i'm just feeling irritated due to insufficient sleep (yesterday was tiring lor.. coz stand and stand).

Today is a very warm day, and wearing that promoter attire makes me rather uncomfortable.. coz my tummy couldn't fit in as well as before. Since june, i've put on 4kgs.. mostly to my now chubby face.. and my belly. I couldn't distinguish whether it is a beer belly anymore.

Thankfully the trip home was rather fast compared to the trip to.. and the bus at 10pm++ didn't have much passengers too.. so didn't have to stop that many times..

Overall a very tiring day where i fail to appreciate. Hoped the next one would be better.

p/s: i enjoyed the muffins door gift though.. hahaha.. at least a change from the usual instant noodles.

The Usual

The Usual.

Got NOR

Took it quite a while to reach, so long that i didn't even want to check the mail liao.

Anyway, my result slip is here, and 'as expected' they typed it correctly.. lol.. don't know to be glad or sad.

Finally over!.. and it was all because of that 3 mods that cost me an additional year.. and one of them was because i absent myself after a 2 week break. It was my last paper lor... If only i just need to retake 2 in my 3rd year... Overall quite a stupid move, but given that year 'plentiful', it's difficult to focus. Ok la.. my fault, and i've paid for it with an additional year and additional school fees too.

Everything seems to be with timing. Graduate also like that, choose modules also like that, and all the more, buy shares also like that. Correct move, wrong time, also gone.

Today the STI rallied down again, after the profit takings, and also the reduced oil production (cut in supply to maintain price = demand is falling = slowdown in growth), falling euro (in order to make exports competitive = falling export = slowdown in growth), plus the chwee-ing of lehman (one of the more hard hit negative news of the week, even though fred and fan was rescued). Today it fell 80 over points, and there is no signs of the economy recovering. Of coz, IMO, i'm quite pessimistic about the economy coz the financial system is integrated across nations. One bank chwee can lead to another bank chwee-ing.. in the end a lot of them chwee, then people get no money to start new biz and they chwee also. Then those that invest in their shares also chwee. Chwee until the point when it can chwee no longer, then perhaps they will be happy. Anyway, i wonder where all the money since before the sub-prime went to. Money can just disappear 1 meh? Surely it must have gone somewhere.. perhaps into the developers' pocket of those estates. In conclusion, the rich just get richer (that is exclude the banks.. they suay la).

Anyway, maybe i might end up in some banks too.. coz i seriously wonder what my degree can do other than banking and finance (becoz it is banking and finance).. or maybe i should go learn how to groom dogs? LOL.. (never work with animals or kids). Haiz.. the coming of NOR means quite a lot wor.. for one, my degree is confirm (it should already but i just want the hard copy to verify) and then, it's time to adjust to a different mode.. afterall, it was one whole year of this kind of lifestyle (or maybe it was 4 since the beginning of my SIM days).. and it is rather challenging to change suddenly. Arr.. i don't want to leave the 'shire'.

Still, a CFG performance coming up on saturday at ICA, we'll be a part of the whole performance playing 2 pieces - xiao ding dang and japanese graffiti iv (without repeats). So.. will you be there?

No NOR

Today i went downstairs to check the mail, but no NOR (notification of results) yet. My friend already got it.. so perhaps it'll be here tomorrow. After which, i have absolutely no excuse le. I know i've been procrastinating on finding a job, and i've given all sorts of excuses.. and i've got loads of them still.

Bear time must hold more cash wor.. so don't anyhow spend. Wait for opportunity and then invest in one good company to maximize wealth. Notice the word is invest, not bet hor. All the salary earned will be eroded by inflation sooner or later. Finance like econs, is quite difficult lor.. coz there are always 2 sides to every story. So oil prices falling is bad news.. depending on the 'majority' of people siding each view (and hence sliding the market direction). They win by numbers. So Mac and Mae got 'rescued' and the STI chiong until don't know like what.. maybe only to chwee a few days later when people starts taking out profit. You'll never know and i'll never know too.. if not i can really forget about going to work and just sit by my comp every morning waiting to earn 3k in an hour (a joke shared by my friend). If only it was so easy, then i can forget about buying toto too.

My hair got shorter by the day.. if this keeps on, i'll be botak before i know it. With a short short haircut, my face looks super plump.. for the 1st time. Suddenly had so much to zhng before work starts, and perhaps, i might take down feature one of these days. Been putting on 3kgs since the euros, and now i couldn't stand hunger pangs. And now i crave for the ribeye steak i saw 2 saturdays back.

And now then i know that pakki got 'special attention' that day at the groomer's. He was giving some treats to take home too. Only he got.. coz the groomer said pakki was very cute. Most probably is the toot haircut he got when my sis tried to DIY. No wonder he seems so happy.

I substituted this Entry with..

Pakki is almost 21 months old le, and still as cute as the 1st day he came.




He looks sleepy though..


After grooming.

Pakki went to a new groomer this week, as recommended by one of the staff of the chocolate factory. She was having a grooming course there, and so we can get discount. Quite a nice place, coz the moment pakki went in, they feed him some treats.. plus, the learners there were all so delighted by pakki's arrival. When the job was done, pakki got 'dressed up' with a bandanna. Too bad he missed the class 95 bandanna when he went for the dog walk the other time.. coz i think bandannas look very nice on dogs.

Was on my way to boonlay for pract when i saw one stray dog crossing the road. It almost got knocked down by a truck.. and the dog siam.. then it ran down the middle of the road.. so very dangerous. Strays are so poor thing.. especially in this urban place. The other time, another stray at my place here died coz it ate a dead bird. I wondered why people would want to abandon their pets lor.. they really can't survive outside.. and other shelters also won't have place for them to stay in.

Those that feed strays also are no better.. coz the more you feed, they more they reproduce.. and this is very irresponsible lor (if you want, bring them home.. not just feed as and when you like).. 不知是爱还是害. Want to feed go to the sea and feed the fishes or prawns la.. But not silverfishes hor.. i don't like them.. they are so all over the place hindering and irritating. Please do not feed them.

At band today, i kind of like the acoustics of the 2nd level. Very spacious and makes a nice echo. Superb for hiding imperfections. Was trying my projections as such, and found the scc's holton 179 to be very very nice. Tone not really that good, but it was easier to project. Plus, it didn't have that much tuning problems at the higher octaves. Quite very nice indeed. And i was so glad that the 179 was so nice today.

Rain came and had to abandon all my night activities.. i dislike rain when i had to go places. I could have stayed all night at scc though.. that is if my stomach don't rebel.

Home soon, and instant instant noodles as usual. I think this is the Nth time i ate instant noodles this week le. Instant noodles with crab sticks and egg.. cost less than $1. To think that MGR w/egg cost $4.50.. that amounts to daylight robbery. Thought i kind of missed the kopi tarik there.. so now, i switched to home-made milo instead. And there are variations of milo lor.. i thought milo mocha already quite pro le... now they introduce cereal de.. wah.. i can have 3 sachets everyday also won't get bored.


I think my pots and kettles are going to be as black as each other if this keeps on.

Thursday at hq for the dry run, campus superstar Benjamin came and he sang 伯乐. It was very nice even though that was just a partial rehearsal. And the song was nice too.. lol.. the melody got stuck le.

Read this on the SSA times, "cherry blossoms are cherry blossoms, peach blossoms are peach blossoms". I find it quite meaningful, though sometimes i still forget. I got STM, but there is no need to remind my of my STM. When i forget, i remember.

My Saturday night ruin by rain (saving me some cash in the process).. I wonder where all the life will go when work begins. So why not grab it now? It is a once in a lifetime opportunity wor. if not now, then when? (looks so familiar)

Oil Run

Whoa. They said it was a bull run a few days back. Now it was bull sh*t.

The STI ls-ed like nobody's business even though oil eased for quite some time. And strangely enough, it was the easing that caused the bloodshed. Profit being compromised due to a lower crude price.. it shows how cabbage we really are.

And oil, makes man city a serious contender for the title this time round with the injection of funds from new owner. Now they can buy like mad.

And?

And so they really upload the results today.

And i got what i deserved.. (and prayed for) for i expect no more for what i've put in for this academic year. Since the first paper, i wasn't sure anymore. Was an attempt for a lower really.. yet, it turned out to be a struggle for 3rd, or even just a pass.

And i've got a surprise. It was actually closer to then not to. IM shocked me most.. it was one paper which i didn't know what i was doing and yet..

And as expected, my FR almost buang-ed (+1 only), due to the fact that i did the entire question wrongly and in the process consumed 1/2 of my time and i still got it wrong. Respect to all accountants doing consolidations out there.

And FI after 3 attempts (2 absents), i finally got it. This was my "hidden" module. The fact was that, i didn't go for it (again) during my 3rd year.. and i didn't want to say it (save all those niam-ing from those that cared or just want to niam). Not as well as expected, but it makes no difference (to my classification) since it was the last paper of all my mods.

And the reason why i was so unsure of the outcome was, in the event that i failed 2 mods, whatever i had will be 'downgraded'.. and i might end up with nothing. Nothing after 4 years.. and i don't know how to account for the time + money spent.

And i'm very thankful atm that i've cleared all, secured an hons though perhaps i should have done better. Never been so glad that everything concluded so nicely. It was afterall, a 3+1 years event which dragged for too long already.

And of all, this was one outcome which i'm totally clueless of. It could be either way.. but thankfully, all turned out well.

And i should wait for my NOR before i really celebrate. Anyway, results should be known to all by the coming convocation.

And now what? Time to get ready for full-time job hunting. I might need to ponder on what i want.. if not end up quitting halfway, then got to restart again. Criteria: my 5Ps of a career - prospect, pay, perks, people, place. So it isn't a question of when rather than a question of where. I am all ready (after i get the NOR).

OMG (!)

Rumored that the results will be out very very soon. Should be one of these days, if not today.

OMG.

Weekend

Saturday 8/30:
Was around eating "damn good food at a damn good price" (which is botakjones) at the quiet quiet canteen just beside SPH. I think the service there was very nice lor.. coz the staff kept asking is everything alright. And price was alright too, just that i got too full too soon.

After the heavy dinner on a rainy day, was on my way to scc. Was informed of a "surprise performance".. ya, the surprise was for us, not the audience. Actually was for the cfg of our previous instructor.

Played "Xiao Ding Dang" and "Japanese Graffiti 4" , both symphonic band version, and given almost the same few players, plus a few others, we sounded quite good. Of coz, we had a tuba player.. so it made everything much more concrete.

Especially liked the jap graf 4.. coz was with SWE when i first played it (actually i heard this piece long before) but i fumbled on the 1. part. Was maybe around 16 or 17 that time.. i couldn't remember. Hopefully i can deliver it this time round, especially for it is cfg. Must really inspire the people.

Was joined by my colleague and the horn section doubled its strength. Was quite a challenge to play with more in the section coz of tuning issues, but the sound was much much more than if i play alone. Plus, the different parts we played made the music less boring lor.

Ending, sight read a brass octet of 3 pages.. but i have no idea what the piece is about.. hahaa.. and a lot of empty slots coz our tbones are not around. A very nice sight read piece coz the the harmonics.

The coming practice on thursday at ICA, and i need to bring my baobei horn over.. a much more difficult instrument to tame than scc's but the tone is nicer.

Sunday 8/31:
Woke up early after 4 hours of sleep only to go to pasir ris to "drop prawns".. but i think i went there to drop money. Noobish me didn't get to drop any prawns after 2 hours, and the total haul was 9 by the other 2. Maybe too early le the prawns haven't wake up ba. But they also drop the rock and drop the net on top of the pond too.. hahaa.. the prawns didn't even want to bite my bait lor..

After that we bbq the prawns and though i didn't drop any, i ate quite a few.. hahaha.. but i had to do some "things" to the prawns. Fresh prawns seasoned with salt taste quite nice though.

Slept for the rest of my sunday after reaching home.. coz weather was too nice le.

Nice scene, nice weather..


... but no prawns at the prawns pond.


Haul of the day (with no contributions by me).

Ji Ba Ban

Kind of a last minute decision to go pubbing or rather chilling since TGIF. Anyway it makes no difference whether it was TGIM or whatever.

Saw a lot of ugly sgreans lor.. and i wonder what impression we will leave for those coming for the YO, or even the coming GP. Especially so was the auntie on the bus blocking my exit and still want to niam.. eh i never force you to take bus lor.. li hai go get ji ba ban buy a car la. Expect crowd when you take a bus ok?

Anysways, walked quite a bit from timbre to brewerkz and finally choosing to settle in brewerkz. It didn't work this time round.. coz IPA was too bitter.. hahahaa.. wondered how come.. XIPA taste so much better. Luckily we didn't order a 4000ml tower.. sure can't finish de.

Halfway through, one guy sitting next to our table starts to be merlion (and very badly). 3x merlion lor.. and make the whole place super smelly.. the smell of puke makes me want to puke also.. and my friend claimed that the guy was drinking the fruit flavor de...! LOL.. i didn't even want to know lor.

So we quickly finish our jug and then move on to elsewhere.. really though the puke was cleared, the smell remains, and then hor, that guy that puked still want to papaya about it.. and start asking all his friends to tah. LOL.. one merlion is enough.. and so we quickly paid and go.

Back to timbre, it wasn't as crowded.. and the live band was still there. Really quite a nice place too.. and prices were right, food was nice. Just that the seats were too high.. hahahaa.. my legs couldn't reach the leg rest lor.. i not AM ok. Then the live band played the ji ba ban song! The moment i heard the "woo la la~" i knew they were going to sing this.. hahaha.. it was so nice, and to see the reaction of the others.. lol.. i couldn't stop laughing.

Too bad they try to close the area we were siting at around 1.30am, so after the pizza and heavy dinner at home, i couldn't finish the remaining erdinger dark.. aww.. what a waste.. But then again, it's the utility function, not the gian peng function.. so i'm ok with it as such.. Of coz if i have ji ba ban, thing would be different.

2 more Weeks

From the school online portal, the results will be out 2nd week of sept.

Hope that everything will turn out well.

Sitabak

I forgot to mention how nice the sitabak was in my last entry.

Of coz, it cost 5x more than a normal cup of coffee, and almost 20x more than a sachet of 3-in-1.. so expect nothing less.


And.. it got a nice water display too! LOL.

Great ambiance with nice music. The wodden chairs are much better than those plastic ones. The table is so big that we can play mj wor..

It was a nice place to chill.. even without alcohol.

Pissed.

Damn pissed off by the prata stall outside my place.

I think they inflated the price by 20% for no reason. Damn it. GST also never go beyond 20%, not to mention the higher than usual food inflation in sg. They cook with crude is it?

And the usual cup of coffee made my blood boil.. it taste as if like they didn't have enough coffee, so they make do with adding more water.. making it super dilute. Is the food inflation really that bad meh? You tell me lor.. mee goreng with egg cost $4.50. Think what? BCM with PRAWN only cost $3.50. Their mee goreng don't even have meat lor. Nothing, just some ketchup and an egg - $4.50. By the way, it used to be much much cheaper, perhaps just a week ago. I don't understand why they raise prices by so much, so anyhow, and that they cut corners in preparations. In any case, i'm not going to go there anymore. Once is already too much. I just don't like the idea where people do biz without integrity (that includes certain styles of hard selling.. you get what i mean). You are just telling me that you show no respect to me by exploiting my goodwill lor.

It was confirmed when i asked the casher how much each item cost (they don't have a price list, so that they can anyhow bom), and he gave me a different answer for at least one of the item.. then he changed his mind again upon seeing my surprised face.. so i guess they must have rigged it. I was so so pissed that i left my coffee untouched, paid and then left for the nearby sitabak for my caffeine fix. I am never never never ever going to patron that prata stall ever ever again.

I just don't like they way they are doing this.. if you want to do certain things that might incur the wrath of people, do it at an appropriate time, in an appropriate manner. It might just get back to you one day.

OBG

I think i OBG for sleeping right after eating that bcm.. in the end, the reflux came back. Disliked it when i couldn't enjoy eating anything.

Was at CQ steamboat on friday, but didn't eat as much as i used to.. and it didn't taste as nice as it used to be.. plus, it now cost more and more, from $12 to $15 and to $18. Price is also part of my utility curve.

Wondered what happened to the used-to-be very nice train station of the west side.. nowadays, it get quite messy during the book out time, then conglomerate here and there also. I still prefer the trip back.. at least i need not siam the crowd.

Pract was, only 6 of us, but each a different instrument. It was quite unique sounding, and we've got all range covered. Did scales on "i recommend", just as the sec school days, but with a better reach of the higher octave. It's been quite a while since i started playing on the horn.. to be exact, almost 12 years. Certain things are already programmed, and without realizing, it just occur naturally. But of coz, there are certain other things which didn't.. and really, practice makes permanent. If practice on the wrong thing, it will make the wrong thing permanent.

It was not as interesting as compared to playing scores, but with the number we got, i think it can sound very bad playing any written piece. A time for us to really look at the fundamentals and work on the skills we lack.

And what is lacking in my horn playing is the intonation between each note. The horn, like some of the other brass instrument (except the tbone) doesn't have a perfect pitch. There are some innate "flaws" which the instrument tends to sound out on certain notes. There are compensation to be made, but sometimes too much, and sometimes too little. And when there are other things to take note of, it can be difficult to keep a perfect pitch on a imperfect instrument. So when it gets "programmed", it can be taken off the equation. Some of the string players got very good intonation regardless which scale they are on.. and it seems to occur to them naturally. Who knows how many years they've trained on these.

I started late on horn playing, and taught by my seniors who were not professionals too. I don't mean to undermine them (i'm actually very grateful to all my seniors who taught me), but that is what our system can offer us. And being in a school that doesn't focus on the band, we didn't get the additional training require. I guess the reason why some of the national orch still need external players is that we didn't start from young (that's why we really lose out). My parents are not inclined to music, and so my actual "training" began when i was 12.. it was already very late. And then the quality of training also wasn't that good. When i moved on to jc, it got worse.. i actually switched instrument to fill the gap.. then i lost touch during my NS days due to working shifts and braces and also their refusal to grant me a chance to play in the first place (which thankfully they didn't.. hahaa.. i think i gained more being a SA).

Now i can't learn as well le.. as shown by my declining grades.. haha.. and i wonder how am i going to catch up. I don't mean to go pro, but i hoped to be able to deliver when called upon, and to keep up just not to hinder the rest of the group.

Thankful for all these challenges and disappointing stunts and also the chance to be exposed to orch music. It made me want to learn (for the moment) and re-learn. Perhaps what i need most is how to overcome the nerve factor. Even though i don't get 750k for a medal, i still can get kan cheong when i got some exposed parts to play.

Well.. it seems i like to niam a lot about pract these days.. lol.

@ St James

And as usual, the SOP for crubbbing (i need to get my hair dry.. and the hair dryer will wake the whole village up).

And as usual, pakki greeted me with his "sai-nai-ness".. awww.. haha.. sometimes i wondered, will another dog behave the same way as him? No matter what happened, he always cheered me up with his strange attics. Of coz, i'm super glad that sis brought him home.

Now he knew more and more, and it was quite delighting to watch him do all those tricks.. and he knew much more. No wondered some people are willing to sell their house to clone a dog. It was just an extraordinary experience.

Back to crubbing.

Been quite some time since i last crubbed... it was like since june.. and now it's already mid August. It was a while back when there were 3x crubbing per month.. now all's been busy with work or other committments.. perhaps i too, will turn out to be such one day. This time was, 1x hennessy and 1x martell.. and my reward of the day, 2x glass ball bearings.. ahaha.. they are so nice to keep.. and it's a waste to not ask the bar tender to extract them. All in all, i now have 4x of them.. 2 which i got from my 23rd bday. perhaps someday, i might collect 1 bottle of them.. but maybe i rather not. It was afterall, shared by 5-6 of us only.

Was at powerhouse 1st due to the lack of space at boiler, and then we moved on to boiler to be treated with jay's "安静" from the live band there.. quite nice actually.. anyways better than those wannabes.

Moved to dragonfly when the lights were out at 4, and at dragonfly, i heard them sang the "hai kuo tian kong" by beyond in canto.. it was so super nice lor. And then the theme song of "200 pounds beauty" - aww. Brain was still in working condition nevertheless. Sometimes, the past just came, especially when the cab past by certain areas. I've already put them behind, but, sometimes i wondered what would have been if not.

Anyways, i'm happy.. especially so when i got my bcm in front of me. Later during lunch time, i got to wake up and join in the chocolate factory's "hungry ah wu's festival" buffet lunch. I'm sure it beats the international buffet somehow.. and i'm so so glad for it. Hopefully i got no hangover..

Bcm didn't taste as good UI, and i got the feeling of puking everything out... but i guess not.. i don't have the "L plate" on my forehead.. which reminds me.. not to go crubbing on my bday.. lol..

Congrats to the sg team on their 1st medal since a nong nong time.. no matter what they get, it's already a very good achievement le.. jiayou team sg! (though singaporean cannot praise one..).

Long-ed

Had a bad case of flu wor.. the nose runs and runs.. non-stop, except when i'm sleeping. The problem is, i can't get to sleep. Maybe the coming end-of-aug got something to do with it.

Just last week, the village chief's spaceship 5 kena long-ed by a similar type of driver that long-ed me a few years back. But this time round, the driver super suay.. coz the driver crashed into stationary vehicle at the traffic light.. which means.. confirm is the driver's fault le. To make matters worse, the driver crashed into another vehicle behind the spaceship 5.. a bit like proxy like that.. and hor.. that vehicle behind the spaceship 5 was a spaceship 3. LOL.. this time ho seh liao!.. 1 crash crash 2 spaceships. Erm.. some people just don't know how to drive leh. And heard from the village chief, total repair cost for the 2x spaceships might be in the 10k+ range. No wonder the car insurance co. often report losses.

Anyway, i don't get to drive anymore.. now that vios is gone too.. and that spaceship 5, i can't drive without a veh comm (+ live SWD).. that i rather opt for a bus ride.

OTOT TOTO

OK.. i need not wait till monday for my 8 million dream to be gone. Anyway, i just bought a little bit only.. so i actually didn't expect to win anything (as usual).

Was queuing up for the toto when i saw some foreign workers buying many sets.. and i wondered, if they really won, will they thank sg pools for the lottery? Of coz, everybody gets a chance at it.. so long as you buy, you'll get one (or many many.. depends on how much you buy).

Even kids are somehow being attracted by the 8 mil draw.. still 2 mil shy of the angpow draw. Was at CQ today for beering and i saw a bunch of kids matching winning numbers with a stack of toto tickets. As if they can't wait to know they didn't win like that.. need to do it just outside the toilet, and in the public meh?

By the way, the jackpot is shared by just 8.. which is still quite a lot. In case you all are wondering how much i dump into the pool, it was $3... lol.. in any case, still the same result of my previous $22 input.. so.. i've 'saved' $19 (which was then dump into beering cost).

Perhaps i didn't win the jackpot, that's why i'm feeling ill now. Actually i've been not feeling well since a few days back.. my nose kept running, and there isn't any ways to stop it.. and after beering, it got worse.. now my throat is swollen too.. no wonder it hurts when i played on the horn. I really need to take a break le.. just one week will do.

So inspired was i that i took to learning more about some classical composers online. At least now i know what kv numbers are for.. it's very unique, and only applicable to Mozart works. A bit similar to the opus numbers used by other composers. In all, the kv number runs till 626, with the horn concertos at kv. 412, kv. 417, kv. 447 and kv. 495.

By the way, the numbers are not inspiration for toto hor..

The 8mil Draw

Once again, a draw the exceeds the usual jackpot.. but as usual, the prize attracts additional punters and therefore sharing the prize money. Well.. if anyone is lucky, he/she might be the sole winner wor.. but if suay.. maybe the 8 mil is shared by 40+ people.

So these few days, i've been 'irritating' people with hypothetical questions of what if they won the coming toto.. lol.. as if it was so easy to win like that. Read some long long time ago on the ST.. the actual chance of winning is 1/8,000,000. LOL! But then again, people are still winning.. as they always say, "got buy, got chance!".. totally agree.. but everything is up to luck leh.. so even if you buy $2 quickpick, it would be perfectly alright... maybe the computer is nice to you and give you the winning number lei? You never know unless you try (i alwasy tried le then i know i shouldn't have..lol).

LOL.. i'm not promoting gambling here.. and you need not to be tempted.. unless you need that extra 8 mil to save the failing banks or something like that.. then maybe you can try. However, do recognise that this is one of the 'fastest' way and also one which requires minimum 'investment' in return for millions.. that is, if you win la. And that, you'll know the results by friday.. and so can stop dreaming (and return to reality)of how to spend that 8 million by the next weekday.

Last Sunday

Some overdue post.

Went for MG last sunday with my sis wor, but the toopid bus no.5 didn't want to cooperate.. and so we just missed the actual gongyo. So perhaps, got to set off earlier for the coming week lo. It was a good start anyway.

Went 'pee-collecting' for pakki in the late noon at grandma's place.. coz coffee was there too. I thought only pakki was hyperactive.. coffee was very active too.. no wonder they are 'cousins'.

In the end, pakki still failed to learn how to pee at home.. zzz..

=(

Don't know do what at practice yesterday.. seems like nothing much accomplished.

And after Mozart, they moved on to.. Beethoven! Wah seh leh.. all the classical all come in.. lol.. and really seriously, i don't know much about them. Just find that, i'm on a different frequency.

The wind section is getting smaller in size nowadays.. yesterday left only 4.. even boss also didn't turn up. But still, it goes on..

Classical music sure give the wind players a bad scare.. and i tio chua-ed when i saw my score. Beethoven symphonie in A, D, and E. LOL.. sight-read+++ (plus transpose). Super difficult leh.. especially when the whole string of music goes beyond the lines (and out of my range).. super difficult. Trying too hard to find the right notes, and end up getting lost easily. The strings (most of them) having played this piece before, didn't have much difficulty.. i guess even if it was a sight-read, they won't encounter much problem also ba.

Just to help to find some excuse for myself (and the wind section).. we are not exposed to such music during our years of playing.. and really not used to how things where being presented... if not, ask the strings play some of those band music lor.. i think they'll cry too.

Already already, i'm trying to cut down on band music le.. already already i stopped listening to those nice nice de band music le.. and already already i start to read mozart le.. but.. it won't be so soon wor.. still got to familiarize with the range/notations of classical music. BUT.. there is nothing much i can do if people don't want to turn up leh! Grrr... angry leh.. haha.. actually is disappointed la.. yesterday, we are limited by the instrumentation.. and so, there isn't really much to do. Practice ended early, and so i left early too.

Thought that at least dinner was going to be nice, but.. it seems that standards have dropped, while prices are still on the rise. Was very full, but nothing was nice. Another disappointment.

Horn Concerto

Was listening to some other horn concertos on Imeem, and apparently one was performed by a school band.

Was rather impressed.. but i got the impression that they just sabo him/her.. lol.. it wasn't easy at all. Not at all. And the piece is about 7 mins. Towards the end i can't really catch the melody.. but i must say the intonation was quite good (better than mine anyway, any case.. coz i used the b-flat horn for everything and anything).

And then i realised that i've got 3 horn concerto scores that were bought during 2001 in my bookshelf. I couldn't attempt them during 2001.. coz was still quite 'lousy' leh.. or maybe i thought i was.

Now i think, 3 is a bit too little.. i'd like to acquire more.. especially mozart's horn concerto no. 1 and no. 4. Beginning to learn more about classical music.. which of coz, wasn't taught during my secondary school days. By the way, i didn't even have a grade of music theory.. so i knew very very little.

I got serious problems with the tunning on the lower register.. coz i still use only the b-flat horn.. lol.. re-learning is going to be so 'painful'..

Time to practice for tomorrow practice le.

A change of Environment.. Soon.

One more month to the release of results (i hope).. and, a change of environment.

And it will change no matter what.. i'll try not to turn to the "dark side" lor.. lol. Of coz, it might be 'essential' for survival in the workplace (due to E-99).. but maybe not so elsewhere. And actually, not everyone is a "colleague" (to me and to you).

The villagers (plus some of my friends) also complained to me about their workplace... lol.. except pakki (he got no workplace.. he only eat, sleep and play..) Their co-workers pattern more than badminton leh.. maybe coz they got lots of 'commitments', then have to 'kill' to get that extra bit of bonus/promotion. Maybe they need to buy some of that ailing bank stocks so as to 'save the whole economy' or what (they are doing something very noble mind you). And some companies do support this kind of working environment as they claim that it boost productivity. Of coz, they don't set up biz for you to la kopi inside.. so don't expect to find people there serving kopi.

101 kinds of them.. interesting.

Actually i'm worried about my results only.. very worried. Sigh leh.. Zzzz.. no good results means less choice.. and more likely to get underpaid or a sai environment.

Of coz, all these are never ending.. just that when i'm not at work, i don't expect to be facing the same old sai all over again.. (hey i'm not even paid for that leh..).

Out of Molting

My hermie is out of its molting again.. so i still have 2 hermies.

Orchestra Pract.

Today tried out another one of those quintet, but without the oboe.. so it sounds a bit weird.

Was encountering a lot of higher harmornics.. so i guess quite a number of times i lost my sense of pitch.. and when we played at the stairs there, it was quite difficult to hear myself and the others. A bit messy at first, but got better as we moved along. My parts got running notes somemore.. run so fast until i couldn't catch. Slow also can't catch.. i think i got mental block or something.

My tone today was rather bad.. as a result of going to too many practices. Strangely, i always 'show some improvements' after MIA for a few weeks. Anyway, horrible tone i had today, and i don't like it.

Was very tired and almost falling ill before going for pract.. coz i slept at 6am the night (or morning) before. Woke up a few hours later.. and it was time to go pract. Then the bus driver also don't know what he drive.. an unplesant ride lor. No wonder i always start pract with a bad mood. 1.5 hour ride and 2 transfers leh.. very seh-ing de.

Anyway, got new things to work on after every pract.. but finally, i can auto transpose le.

That Cup of Tea

3am, and i still couldn't get to sleep. Must be that cup of tea, or so i thought.

Listening to the piano version of Tifa's theme of my blog at this hour with my earphone, it just felt so different.

Been quite a while since i've cleared all my modules, and yet, it seems like just not long ago.

Was with the rest of the then warlords, including ah gong zm for lunch today. Was talking about the days when we used to crub, even when we've got lessons to attend the following day. After school, we'll go to the clementi K-box (was still very new then) and sang until evening. It was so fun being a student. How i missed those days. Now that the rest of them are all working, sometimes it can be difficult to coordinate the time even for lunch. For now at least, i've been able to.. but, who knows what when i start working? Maybe for some reason, i might end up where i don't want to.

Today the village chief was not happy with one of the staff of the chocolate factory... coz that guy chute pattern to the customers coz there were "too many" of them.. "too many" by his standards, and so he was unhappy having to serve the customers.. i think he threw the chocolates to the customers wor. It was in fact, just 3 customers altogether.. not a lot by industry standards. In fact, he should be happy there are still people buying at this time of the year. Sometime ago, he already chute pattern le.. as if he was the pro like that. Maybe due to his experience, the rest of the staff couldn't challenge his position, and therefore, he was made the manager. Manager supposed to have CRM.. but he chased away customers like that. Some of the customers bothered to give feedback, and so it was known what he did (and didn't).

A new road was being built just opposite my block.. which means, they are really going to build "that hub" le. NIMBY lei.. But it seems, the pasture is always greener on the other side. People just like to compare and be envious (with no regards to any skeleton). So.. how come other people de estate kept increasing in value while ours are being made into "that hub"? LOL.. if life is fair, then we are no different to communism liao le. That said, people don't have any obligation for anything.. becoz they don't owe. Maybe it applies to moral obligations too.

That day while "chilling" at my void deck (like some ah zek like that), i saw a lady from the terrace with 4 dogs (!) of various sizes came over to the patch of grass opposite my block to let her dogs ease themselves. So inconsiderate lor.. there is a park built for them, yet they want to come over. Is our grass greener? No wonder people can step on dog poo. 4 poos leh.. how to siam? Then i saw another mini schnauzer just like pakki. Salt and pepper de.. and is female de.. and her behaviour is just like pakki lor.. lol.. all schnauzers, same pattern. She is smart too.. coz when she knows it's time to go back, she refuses to get into the lift.. haha.. so smart leh.

Pakki seems happy these days, coz he got into a nice village. Even grandpa and grandma dotes on him. The same to pakki's cousin coffee. He too got a nice village that cares and protects him. But sometimes, too doting can be quite harmful to the dog.. just the other day, the village chief open some durians (given by some friend of his) for pakki to eat, coz he was sniffing at the durian.. and that pakki liked it so much that he kept bugging us for more. The point is.. the durian was opened for pakki.. and we just happen to be able to eat coz pakki couldn't eat so much.. lol.. what is happening to the packing order? That pakki ar.. is making my mum laugh so much.. and i'm so glad that my sis chose him (ok la.. he was the only mini schnauzer left.. but who cares?).

My remaining hermies are quite well too, though i no longer fuss around them that much le.. perhaps i'm used to them doing their routine. Venti went into molting for the 3rd time in the year, and i haven't seen it for quite a while. Grande was alone in the large tank now that i've iso venti.. i don't want another case of cannibalism wor.

I'm just trying to make myself tired so that i can have a good sleep, so this entry was kind of messy.

Rhapsody in Red

Before i forget about the 'orchestra' practice on sat..

Sometimes i wondered do they really care about what is happening? The top-down apprpoach will only work if target are realistic. Maybe it is realistic.. but it sure need a lot more time, and players.

I don't understand. What is the difference between a wind band and orchestra? In this context, does it matter? Are we able to reach out to more if it is an orchestra? Right now, it all seems like a joke lor.. it turns people off, especially with that number. Parts are missing, and hence players are missing. I don't like to play when there are missing parts.. it just makes the whole music sound bad. For an orchestra arrangement, it's even worse.

Actually i don't want to complain one.. just that yesterday boss asked.. so i told her lor. Of coz, my boss also got boss. Maybe they don't understand.. or maybe i don't understand what they don't understand.

Yesterday was quite kong bu.. other than the disparity between the wind and strings, i don't think i was playing in a group. Quite disheartening lor. On the bright side, i kind of liked the tone from the 2 instruments in SCC. They are of coz, students' model.. which means a lot more easier to 'tame' than my baobei horn.. but quite very nice tone they produced in scc. Makes me so want to learn some horn concerto. Someone told me before, the more you play with lousy players, the worse you become.. hahaha.. that is so so true.. but i've been listening to horn concerto for the past few weeks.. especially when the bus took so long just to reach boonlay. I guess it helps to make to want to produce a better tone.

Sight-read 3 pieces.. actually 2+. The other 1 (Rhapsody in Blue, George Gershwin) needed a much stronger brass section.. so it was KIVed. Yupz.. i was again, the only brass section there.. lol leh. No fun lor.. my sound was so obvious.. lol.. play wrong sure know. Been working on the higher ranged intonation.. and i was so surprised it helped so much in sight-reading.. especially i didn't mis-pitch that much due to the close harmornics.. wow leh.. really must work on it somemore. Encountered some weird notations again.. this time was the stopped horn technique.. arrr.. so busy leh.. ahahaha.. normally, i'll just ignore it.. coz my stopped horn really cmi.. a bit like the tyre pom zek sound like that.

So here goes another 'orch' practice.. as i promised, and so i'll stay.. no matter how bad.. no matter how scary. If it comes without a struggle, it won't mean much.

Meh~

Meh meh meh~ do i look like one?

So glad that my antenna is back.

Today's topic: The Thirty-Six Stratagems (三十六計)

1. 瞒天过海
2. 围魏救赵
3. 借刀杀人
4. 以逸待劳
5. 趁火打劫
6. 声东击西

7. 无中生有
8. 暗渡陈仓
9. 隔岸观火
10. 笑里藏刀
11. 李代桃僵
12. 顺手牵羊

13. 打草惊蛇
14. 借尸还魂
15. 调虎离山
16. 欲擒故纵
17. 抛砖引玉
18. 擒贼擒王

19. 釜底抽薪
20. 混水摸鱼
21. 金蝉脱壳
22. 关门捉贼
23. 远交近攻
24. 假道伐虢

25. 偷梁换柱
26. 指桑骂槐
27. 假痴不癫
28. 上屋抽梯
29. 树上开花
30. 反客为主

31. 美人计
32. 空城计
33. 反间计
34. 苦肉计
35. 连环计
36. 走为上

Oh well.. i just cut and paste them from somewhere.. my chinese isn't that good anyway.

Sometimes, the 36 Stratagems just appear in real life.. and perhaps, about to make some awe at the ingenuity of the modern day application. Sometimes only. And sometimes it appear in a combo, it can get quite scary. Anyway, 磚 and 玉 got too much difference le. Arr.. i just know that i'm too tired after almost a week of data entry for the chocolate factory. But i'm done with it.. checked until the eyes almost drop out lor.

OT(ed) today coz reached home rather late.. and already 2am le, and i'm still waiting for the village chief to wake up so as to make any last minute amendments... so till then.. maybe i can't sleep tonight le. Anyway, i tried waking the village chief up le.. but he went back to sleep.. of coz, it's been a busy day for all the chocolate makers, so i understand why he is so tired. In contrast, i've been "appearing" to be rotting at home, and anybody ask me, i'd say, "at home nua lor".. lol.. really think can nua until so nua meh? Come and nua one week for me to see la.. i think it might be more difficult than the imprezza challenge wor. I really, have no obligation to disclose anything or everything.

GQ and the Chocolate Factory Again

Been busy doing the list of inventories for the chocolate factory. It's been the 3rd or 4th year or so.. and i'm getting better at it. Afterall, it's just data entry.. nothing too difficult. The only thing is that, any error on my part will translate to a difference in tax paid by the chocolate factory (that is if the others after me also failed). Remembered that the 1st time i did, i doubled the inventory figures due to double counting of the excel formula.. that was quite a bad one.. coz the inventory figures will cause a higher taxable profit. (Gross profit = Sales - COGS, and COGS = O/stock + purchases - C/stock)

So i have been extremely careful now.. i double checked my work, and i rechecked the formula.. just so becoz maybe the others won't care much. Of coz it all took a lot more time, and caused me to be super sian at times. What to do... i wasn't allowed in the physical inventory count (coz i can't differentiate one chocolate type from another).. and i wasn't really trained in this line since young.. i knew nothing to be of help at all. Accounts is perhaps the only way i can contribute.. but then, my accounting also cmi.. so.. perhaps i won't end up in the chocolate factory afterall. Not that i don't want.. but maybe is becoz i can't.

OTed at OTOT till 6am the day before, and was having irregular sleeping hours these days.. been doing everything else at home except going out and looking for a job. Meanwhile, was successfully gaining weight yet again.. but the additional weight is putting some pressures on my arthritis. Sometimes i'd wake up with aches here and there.. a bit like those old people liao.

Another 1 month and 3 weeks to the release of results.. it didn't seems as long now.. just that when it comes, i might be reluctant to leave "the Shire".

Bear to bear the Bear

And after dragging for so long, they finally bear to let the bear come out liao.

Blame it on greed then.. there exist nothing where everyone can gain at the same point in time. Meaning the summation of gain will equal to the summation of losses of all the traders combined since its IPO. Whatever is above or below the IPO price can be due to people still holding on to the stock, increased in 'fair value' of the company (becoz the co. invested in profit making businesses), speculations due to new information released (people buy and buy (or sell and sell) to increase (decrease) the bid, economic condition and the lack of liquid traders - especially in a bearish economy (they can make the % loss quite bad wor..), and a lot more reasons la.. maybe even the weather too.. the point is, so long as the co. is fundamentally sound (if the co. doh (collapse), then the remaining money will go to the creditors 1st.. that is another issue)and there is enough reason to believe that it will rebound (don't be toot enough to buy a bubble lor.. remember, their gain is YOUR LOSS.. bubbles won't rebound 1.. they burst only.. remember the dot coms?), then the strategy is holding long term. Of coz, the opportunity cost of holding the stock must be taken into account too.

That said, i think i'm quite toot to step into the casino realm.. coz they already trying to run le.. then i go catch the 'big change'.. and somemore didn't check the announcement.. so catch a very big 'big change'.. in the end, my 1st trade was my worst trade so far. But of coz (again), i still have this hope that everything would turn out fine once the casino are up.. but.. some investors are trying to build some other casinos in other parts of SEA.. so.. till then, who knows? Maybe really chwee le. So i bo bian got to hold.. coz the 1st day i acquire the stock, it fell by quite a bit.. so i had to hold.. so that i won't lose out on the transaction fees ($50 for buying and then selling online.. in the end it just got worse.. now with the bear out, the 'big change' is quite deep le.

Even before the bull starts to LS, i was already trying to sell off my other holdings. I woke up early in the morning, and submitted the order.. but it was never filled.. the bear came out that day.. and i've lost my window of opportunity that morning by 1 bid.. lol.. blame it on my greed then.

And when this economy gets more chwee, i think the even some of the still prime loans also will turn sub wor.. and then it just gets worse and worse.. and even worst is that some of the funds flow from the equity market to oil speculation.. the oil keeps raising and the equity kept dropping... and then no significant increase in oil production to keep prices down.. what if the market fails?

I don't know how long this all 'big changes' will last.. but i do hoped it won't be long. (just my opinion of the market these days.. i might be wrong too.. but, who cares?.. just don't hold me responsible for others' greed)