CMI

CF was getting from bad to worse. I really really don't like the new lecturer leh.. really, the lecturer plays a very big part. Now i can't really focus that well. Argh.. i don't want to score low low leh.. how ar.. can anyone teach me?

Wasted 3 hours plus today coz i don't really pay attention in class.. wondered why i attended it in the 1st place. But after the break, decided to do my own reading instead.. whaha.. if not really very wasted le. But i'm really glad with myself.. with another half a semester to go, i've only skipped 3 classes.. whaha.. compared to last year, it was so much different. Starts to appreciate what the lecturer is talking about, and then discovered that a lot more i don't know. LOL.. and i discovered something else.. that is, i don't really need to know what i don't know. They just memorize the format, do a few past year question, and get really to score at least a second lower. It is the case, face it. The brain is merely use to remember how the answer looks like.. not to think. In any case, the exam hall doesn't allow the time to think.

Why am i so anxious? Becoz the lectures will be ending at the end of feb.. 3 more months.. confirm not enough time le lor.. and i don't like to da bao again.. slows me down so much that i felt that i'm already lagging.

Was out for supper yesterday night when i asked wm what was there to do nowadays. Other than the "recently" popular ktv and crubbing.. but then.. i lost interest in all of them.. wondered what people of this age group are doing. Should be all busy earning income that it doesn't pose a problem. Which reminds me how irrelevant i am.. sigh.. i have a choice, i had it, but i don't want it. And then i discussed about how come some people made it happended. Like those in MLM.. they drive cars le.. and i still taking bus. I agreed that we all can, and opportunity is plentiful. But, would you risk it? We are, ultimately, different in personality.. why do some people gamble and the rest don't?

I don't know.. i'm just so bored till they asked me, "why don't you go get a job?" Ya lor.. since i at home also online, watch tv and nua... might as well relieve my bordem and as well as get some cash.. but then again, i don't really know if i can cope when i start to study. So the best way is, to start studying, hopefully i won't feel so bored and it might let me feel less guilty.

And.. the more you know, the more you don't know.. it's definately not all that was conveyed.. coz a lot of sensitive issues, if not i'll start bombing people le.. haha.. actually i just want to keep some of the thoughts to myself, of the people whom i missed, and of the memory lane just to me..