Burned

Slept the whole day away.. lol, and i didn't have the mood to attend band pract. Heard that a few of them did not go as well.. lol.. why huh? Coz rain too heavy le, very nice to sleep is it? I was uncertain whether i can make it or not.. the weather plus my cold.. it makes one feverish. In the end, i slept through.. so they've comfirmed, the concert will be on 11th feb.. lol.. hoped that i'll be able to deliver.

That time when i said i wanted to be out of SWE, part of it was, i wanted to ran away.. becoz certain things have evolved till the point where it gets so awkard.. Till now, i still wouldn't know how to react. Indifferent? Or different. Perhaps the best is to run.

Of coz, that was the least of my concern. Just that i joined back SWE (now SNCO) doesn't mean i knew how. I just hope it won't happen. As if i could get over and done with, i couldn't understand why.. oh.. just why? It stills give me an awkard feeling.. and i won't be surprised if it shall last an entire lifetime.

They said, "it's a matter of choice." You chose what you want to be, and then i think if i could, i would already be enlightened. Well, and such irony can be found for someone taking faith. I just don't understand leh.. or maybe, i refused to understand... coz they didn't work out according my logic..

Well, i guess the fever had burned my brain cells le.. so much nonsense. My saturday didn't get burned.. my brain got.

I think i need a new environment again.. but been "grounded" for work, coz they thought i failed coz i work too much.. lol.. maybe partly ba. So what's new? SNCO for one.. but it's actually quite old.. just a change of name. Ar.. i also don't know la.. i won't be having much time to be bothered too..

Just that this school is starting to piss me le. It's been so crowded from the benches to the library, i can't really find a proper place to study. And i've realise, i can't study with too many people.. i tend to get distracted easily.

History repeats again, lol.. and in order to do well, really, some things had to be done. And of coz, this means less of outing.. sian.

So this morning, xy extended the "invitation" to dbl o.. and to think i actually didn't want to go. Well, i guess, slowly overgrown this kind of nightlife le. Stopped seeking, for, afterall, it shall be the same isn't it?

Just yesterday, i've packed my notes into 5 big stacks.. That shall be my minimum requirement. Kind of difficult to keep it going i guess.. certaintly need a lot more than that.

Kind of getting restricted in what i blog.. lol.. and blogs always get into all sorts of trouble..