I've Discovered.

These few days, while msn-ing, i discovered the reason why i couldn't do things well. I've been adopting a fence-sitting policy as always, and hence, i'd try to balance the 2 different spectrum. The end result, i was neither here nor there.. and i've been contradicting myself too much.. no wonder.. it never seems to work.

Knowing doesn't mean anything.. and i guess nothing much will change.

Anyway, was back from OO again.. haha.. long time didn't club and sadly, it still doesn't conclude the crubbing spree. It's been the 4th since the last exam a month ago.. and perhaps, there will be more the coming week.

I was given a choice: to crub or to attend a concert.. but i chose to crub.. like what i was told, perhaps i truly belonged to the "orh um" (dark)side. I wasn't that in the past.. but it no longer matters.

Crubbing this time round was rather fierce.. don't know what happened.. all too 'sad' le? Hahahaha.. of coz, we all have our own problems that even sharing can't help much.

Been bothered quite a lot by certain things.. and i think the only way of solving is ignoring. Perhaps it will not solve permanantly.. and it might never will.. but this is the best solution so far.

I'll blog ambiguously, for i'm just like that.. saying will relieve my stress, yet saying too much will make me vulnerable.. so i chose somewhere in between. As i've said.. perhaps somewhere down the road.. i don't even remember what i'm blogging about.. whahaa...

Rather tired from all the liquor.. lol.. i've lost count of how much i had spent.. perhaps in the 80s ba.. again. Then the kuula jioed for mambo the coming wednesday .. whahaha.. what? I print money 1 is it? But i guess, it only knock that once.. money after all, should not be the master of our life. I wondered, why, people seek the abyss of desire.. one which couldn't be fulfilled. Don't they get it? it will NEVER be enough.. no matter how much.

Yet with regards to cash, i've been growing sour grapes in my farm recently.. haha.. all because of the bullish trend of the economy. I've wondered.. how come money can alter the ego of people so drastically.. it seems to piss me quite a bit. LOL.. after all, i'm just a man.. i will feel.

Surprised was that the village chief have offered me a "loan".. but i was wondering... do i really need to prove something? I guess i rather not.. afterall, the whole life game was about me and me winning myself.. who cares about the others? I mean, so long they don't come and hao lian la.. it can be quite irritating at times.

I think, i'm quite comfotable the way i am now, less a few things and a few more.. The list never ends, and hence so are my desires.

Of coz, there are just too much to be done.. for there is only one chance at times. Read from the ST of the recent accident that happened.. it is really.. unpredictable. So.. why not? For chances are few.

I've been BUI (blogging under influence).. but i'm rather awake.. just waiting for my hair to dry.. haha.. i'm very awake lor, and i've just finished my instant noodles.. the 3rd in this week.. wah lao eh.. quite sian liao leh... haha..